September 29, 2008
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Boyfriend drama....its hard to keep straight when you have more than one-UGH!
So, I think we decided on Dec for him to visit but I wouldn't mind going to the East coast for a few days to get a fix of winter (ie-to remind myself why I hate snow). He is trying to get a new job that will take him around the world so we will have to see how things are come then. I don't know what to think. I tried telling him that he is typical Irish Catholic from the east coast (that should give you a pretty good idea of where he is from) and that he doesn't really tell me what he thinks other than 'just go with it and see what happens'....thats great and all but how do you FEEL about me? lol and I guess I am typical girl in that I want to hear that he is in total love with me and thinks I am the hottest thing to walk the earth and that I am cute, funny, sweet, smart, blah blah blah....lol. Thats just not how guys in general are but I think even more so when they like him, if that makes sense. He just laughs and says I am typical mid-western (but has no reasons for it like I do for him
). I would love to go for next weekend-his bday and mine is not far after.
As for the other guys-the one here-we just go through the day to day motions. Always have. But thats us. He was an abusive, alcoholic. It was a scary time (like years upon years) when we were together so I don't know why I can't give him up. He has other girls (and tells me, sometimes I think he is trying to get a reaction from me but I told him several times that it is ok with me-he knows that I have other guys but I just don't choose to share much about it with him) so things just seem to work.
And for the last one-he is trying to put some sort of ultimatum or something on me about seeing each other (I was just there!). He is going crazy without me (supposedly) and needs to be with me. LOL-I just said, you are unreal. Oh well, what can you do? Horrible person that I am. LOL
OK, I had to go down a size in clothes so I guess I am losing. Its just never fast enough or enough weight. I will get there. I wonder if I could find a doctor to give me liposuction. I really do hate my thighs. Weekend was tough foodwise with one of my sis being here-she wants to go to dinner or breakfast or whatever. Too easy to eat and then I feel like it ruins my progress. I can only imagine when my other sis gets here how tough it will be. I need to order some herbs-I really think they help. I am out of Bladderwrack and there is honestly no where on this island that sells it. I have checked. So, I had to replace it with cinnamon which is supposed to aid in digestion whereas bladderwrack is supposed to improve thyroid function.
*sigh*-its always something with me.
Well, off to get more coffee! Happy Monday!!!
Comments (2)
wow..so many men.. I have thought I wished I had a boyfriend sometimes..in addition to my husband..just to add that excitement..and the weight comes off faster always when dating new men.. I joke with my hubby once in a while.."I need to find myself a boyfriend to have fun with".. I shouldn't joke like that ( cause I do think it's be fun). so I try not to really say that out loud too often. My husband still never tells me his FEELINGS...it seems, unless I pull it out of him..like reel it out with a fishing line.. lol. men..whay are gay men the ones who can talk and converse easily with us. uuugh.. so anyhow...u have motivated me to get to the gym again today.. "JUST 30 min"" is a great way to talk myself into it.. just 30 min a day sounds better..but then, Imay end up doing more..but 30 min is the trick...every day. like you were doing. r u still doing that?
((((HUGS))))
men...sometimes there is something about the abusive guy that keeps you together...a weird sort of addiction...clingy guy...can't live without you sounds a bit full on but then theres cool guy who is probably wanting you with him but prefers to say lets go with the flow...insecure or commitment phobic? girl you have your hands full!!! sending hugs your way xxx
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