February 22, 2008
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Getting closer and closer. I wish I could stop eating. I do not have to motivation to work out more than what I already do. I gave up running because its been basically below zero for 3 months and I just do not want to be outside. I am suffering from depression which hasn't helped either. I am stressed beyond belief and I havent slept in months.
I now have 43.2lbs to lose to get to my goal weight. Yep. You read that right-43.2lbs. So do the frickin math people, that is 151,200 cals to be burned outside of my normal intake/cals burned. 151,200. I better get to work. Damn it. 3.5months ago, I had 14lbs to go to get to my goal weight. See?!! I told you all it was bad. I am ballooning up like no tomorrow. I hate me. DO you have any idea how gross this is?! I hate me!!!!
So, my goal is burn as many cals as possible and eat as little as possible. My BMI will be 18. My body fat % will be less than 20% (females need more fat and I am not Shaq). My weight will be 1XX. I can't bring myself to say it because then you would know how huge I am.
Good bye fatass. Hello again, old friend.
Comments (3)
***hugs*** i wonder that to...was this something i was always going to have? do ed's come written in you birth plan as such! i wish i knew. sounds like things are rough you end too hun, the move is a massive change...as for not sleeping i can 100% relate being a somewhat chronic insomniac and lack of sleep is hell...thinking of you hun xxx
Im with ya...I need to lose about that also well for starters lol...We can doit!
I love the cats...I have a feeling you are not huge to anyone but you...
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